


In Snow

by Woodentrain



Series: 500 word prompts [1]
Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017), Call Me By Your Name - All Media Types, Call Me by Your Name - André Aciman
Genre: CMBYN Drabble Challenge, M/M, POV Elio Perlman, POV First Person, Phone Calls & Telephones, Snow, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:21:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27991416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Woodentrain/pseuds/Woodentrain
Summary: Elio dreams of Oliver in the snow.
Relationships: Oliver/Elio Perlman
Series: 500 word prompts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2175660
Comments: 22
Kudos: 51
Collections: CMBYN Drabble Challenge





	In Snow

**Author's Note:**

> It's about time I posted something. i am working on a) Hard Times, the erectile dysfunction fic you never knew you needed and b) the final chapter/epilogue of For the Rest of Our Lives. But for now? Have this, a short little thing for the CMBYN drabble challenge with the theme of Snow.  
> If the formatting goes all screwy, it's totally my fault. I am now working on a chromebook and it's a learning curve.

In my dreams I see him in snow. 

I think I know why. 

Oliver as something I've never seen, something that could be real, that I may yet have, instead of something I have had and lost.

In reality nothing could be further from my experience. He didn’t even bring a coat when he came to Italy. When the evenings turned chilly he borrowed one of my sweaters. The sleeves were too short, leaving him bare-wristed. We laughed and I wanted to keep him there, safe in my clothes.

But now, asleep, I see him coated and hatted, skin hidden. A smile and blue eyes. I will peel away his layers. 

In my bed in our apartment in the city, I wake and blink him away. 

*

I call him, as we promised. 

_I miss you._

_I miss you, too. I wish..._

_Will you come for Hannukah?_

A pause.

_I don't know. I'll try. Elio, you know I-_

_I know._

_So you remember when-_

_Yes._

_*_

I tell him about the dream-Oliver.

_I dream of you, too. But you're in the sun, sometimes. Other times you’re here, in the city. A glimpse on a corner, a face in a crowd. And then you’re gone, and I can never catch you. And I wake up in a panic._

_I could come over. Some time, maybe._

_I don’t know. I don’t think- look, it’s not that i don’t want that._

_I know._

*

_You didn't reply to my letter._

Laughter. _I did. Of course I did. I have it right here. I just haven't gotten around to mailing it yet._ I hear the rustle of paper. 

*

He calls on my birthday.

_I can call you back. My parents don’t mind about the phone bill._

It must be astronomical, but my parents never say anything. The price of the conversations I have with Oliver, largely made up of contented silences.

_It’s fine. I can’t talk for long anyway. I just wanted to say happy birthday._

*

We speak at Thanksgiving. He's agitated.

_Have you ever had to do something you really don't want to do?_

_No, not really. Nothing big, at least._

_Of course you haven't._

I say nothing.

_Wait, Elio, I didn't mean-_

_It's okay._

_It's not okay. Sometimes nothing is okay. That's the whole point._

Quiet. 

_Oliver?_

He chokes on his words. _I don't think I'm going to be able to come over for Hannukah._

He's crying, but it would be cruel to mention it.

*

One morning during Hannukah I wake to a world white with fresh snow. 

I walk, and think about the impossible.

Think about how in the end it was my father who confirmed what, deep down, I already knew.

_I spoke to Oliver. He says he can’t come here for Hannukah._

I think I nodded. Of course. I understand.

Back home the house is warm, the fire a hot bright crackle. Outside it is bright with silent snowfall. 

The phone rings.

In my dreams I will always see him in snow.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr- [natures-cunning-ways](https://natures-cunning-ways.tumblr.com/).  
> 


End file.
